The Three Musketeers (2011) *****

Dashing heroes, damsels in distress, campy villains, and equally campy femme fatales and Jar Jar Binks... okay, fine - maybe not Jar Jar Binks but definitely his equal (that's me being nice).  This is a great swashbuckler, paying homage to the likes of the silver screened swashbucklers of old...!  And the animated series (it was a most awesome show)!
Our three musketeers, aided by baby musketeer - D'Artagnan must come to the rescue of intelligent and noble, but very young Queen Anne, whilst also ensuring France does not descend in to the hands of the dastardly Richelieu, whilst also in turn trying to best arch rival Buckhingham (boo hiss) and outwit cunning, yet beautiful Milady (a double agent for both France and England).  And on top of it all, they have to pander to the lovable but childlike King Louis XIII!
All-in-all, a very big job for our heroes... can they manage it?
Well, they don't get off to a good start.  After being betrayed by Milady (a very camp Milla Jovovich), Athos, Porthos and Aramis (Matthew MacFadyen, Ray Stevenson and Luke Evans) are leading a sedate life of drunkeness - Athos is a self confessed drunk, vanity and ticket dispensing).  Aramis would later put it as being "warriors without a cause."  Basically, they're miserable.  Until the young D'Artagnan comes along... and decides he must kill all three to teach them a lesson.  That is until he spies Rochefort (Mads Mikkelsen), the man who insulted his horse.
D'Artagnan sparks that fire back in to the three musketeers lives, leading them on a mission to save Queen Anne (Juno Temple) from the power hungry Richelieu (Christophe Waltz).  Richelieu has decided he wants to get rid of "these royal children," as they constantly go against his advice.  Basically, he's upset King Louis XIII didn't scold the musketeers after making his guards look bad in a skirmish (4 musketeers against 40 inept gurads).  So, he's asked Milady to frame the Queen as a love cheat by stealing her diamonds (a gift from King Louis) and stash them away secretly in fashion-obsessed Buckingham's (a very very hammy Orlando Bloom) secret vault, thereby also framing him. So, the Queen will be executed, France will go to war and the inept King will be overthrown.  Well, Richelieu did not factor in our heroes.
Cue double crossings, triple crossings and crossings I've never even heard of! An adventure across the skies!
Each character of the story will have you hooked and most will have you rolling around in stitches.  Each character accept D'Artagnan's love interest.   Gabriella Wilde's Constance is very pretty to look at, but her deliverance of some of her cringe worthy lines were just awful.  It would have been better to have given her minimal lines and just make her part of the scenery... not that she had a major role to begin with.  And let's not forget the Musketeers very own Jar Jar Binks a.k.a James Corden and his character Planchet.  Yes you get a few laughs the first time you watch it, but the second time is just too irritating to comprehend.  He might not have been so bad if they had cut some of his lines and his scenes... or maybe all his scenes.
But don't let them discourage you.  What made this fun to watch was that every actor and actress seemed to enjoy every second of playing their character.  Orlando Bloom and Milla Jovovich stood out the most in their hysterical hammy portrayals.
This is a fantastic movie for a family outing or just something to watch with a few friends.  Because that is what it's target audience is, the family.  Or for young girls who like their pretty boys.  They could have made The Three Musketeers even better had they factored in another target audience... the older female (though I am only 26).  Luke Evan's Aramis is the one that caught my attention.  He reminded me of a modern day Tyrone Power combined with Orlando Bloom's pirate Will Turner.
Though my friend preferred Ray Stevenson's hilarious Porthos.  And I'm sure someone out there fell in love with Athos.  I almost did.
Nevertheless, if you want an adventure to share... this is something  you should put at the top of your list.

Johnny English Reborn ****

What we have here is a fun packed, thrilling, action adventure.  Johnny English is of course figuratively reborn.  I must clarify that since we are dealing with the hilarious Rowan Atkinson!
So, down to the nitty gritty. Our disgraced hero, English, has taken himself off to some remote Asian monk-house to hone himself in the art of defence after a mishap on a mission to Mozambique.  The result of which still causes our hero to have incredibly funny facial twitches.  Then MI7 lead by Gillian Anderson's Pegasus, declares that he must return to help them. That doesn't mean he isn't still inept.  And his ineptness does not mean it doesn't work out for him.  In fact that is the whole familiar theme of the movie, demonstrated particularly well during a hilarious chase scene in which English is chasing after an incredibly fast and agile henchman.  He uses the "technique" his Master has taught him to effortlessly catching the bad guy and retrieve one of three keys that the baddies are after.  Unfortunately for English, he loses said key.  And even more unfortunate, an aged "cleaning" lady is out there trying to kill him every chance she gets.
So, back to the three keys.  English and his fellow agent  (hero-worshipping Agent Tucker- wonderfully played by Daniel Kaluuya) discover what the three keys do.  And so it is a race to retrieve all three keys to save the Chinese Premier.  Along the way, he manages to get the second key... and loose that too!  And to his best friend also- the amazingly gifted (and handsome) Dominic West's Agent One.
Is there nothing this Dominic West can't do?  His performance here, tells me they should have picked him for Bond... or at least a Bond villain.  What I love about Dominic West is that he never actually portrays Agent One as a "hammy" villain.  Agent One, apart from the ludicrous title, could be any villain on any serious action production.  The exception being the toilet scene and the final battle.  Though actually, even through these scenes, he still appeared to be a normal villain.
English also manages to find romance along the way with beautiful (former Bond-girl) Rosamund Pike's Kate.  I must say, her character was quite enjoyable to watch.  She definitely did not outstay her welcome and provided our hero with unobtrusive and much needed emotional support.
I very much enjoyed all the crazy chase scenes, especially the wheelchair scene.  In short, Johnny English is the buffoon version of James Bond.  He even has his own Q, who unfortunately has had many accidents in the course of testing his gadgets.  And just a bonus, a Bond styled song.  Don't let the Buffoonery put you off though.  The buffoonery is part of what makes this a great movie.
A fun-filled movie to watch with the whole family! What I'd advise you all to do though, is to stay at the end of the credits, where Johnny English fulfils his promise to Kate with regards to a certain take-away.

Abduction (2011) ****

Well, who would've thought that Taylor Lautner could have been such a good candidate for an action-man role? OK, so he's actually one of the few least annoying teens in the Twilight saga (we all knew that, right?).  But Abduction, definitely indicates good things for young Lautner.  Yes, he can't act, but then the majority of good action heroes can't either.  Which is why I love them.  No brains, but lots of brawn and great action sequences.  And Abduction had it all! Including a fantastic supporting cast, with the likes of the legendary Sigourney Weaver, Alfred Molina, Maria Bello and the wonderfully swoon-worthy Jason Isaacs (can you tell I love him?) In fact the only annoying detail in the entire movie was our hero's love interest (Lilly Collins' Karen).
So, down to the plot.  I actually liked the plot, because it was straight forward with no twists or turns.  Well, there was a small one, but we see it coming and Lautner's Nathan implying said twist confirms it for us.
Abduction is basically baby Bourne (with a fun reference thrown in... Matt Damon anyone?). Don't let that discourage you from watching it though.  It's still a lot of fun.
So, our slightly troubled hero, Nathan lives with his perfect parents (Jason Isaacs and Maria Bello) and gets along swimmingly with them (you'll have to watch the movie to get that pun!), except for Dad occasionally.... Jason Isaacs' Kevin is quite physically aggressive with his son.  Though we, along with Nathan, find out why later.  So, Nathan and his project buddy Karen, discover a website, in which they subsequently discover that Nathan is on the missing person's list.  Unfortunately, in doing so they not only learn that Nathan's parents are not his biological parents, but their search also happens to unwittingly alert the bad guys that Nathan is no longer missing.  Cue lots of running, fighting and out-maneuvering!
You see, Nathan was placed with his foster spy parents because his real Daddy is a super black-ops guy, who just happens to have stolen some important encrypted names or something like that.  Which means it's open-season on Nathan.  Both the C.I.A. and the bad guys (lead by Michael Nyqvist's, Kozlow) are after him and Karen.  Whoever, gets him, gets to blackmail Daddy black-ops.
We never actually see Nathan's real father (voiced by Dermot Mulroney), not completely anyway, but his presence is definitely felt.  And I like the fact that the movie realises Nathan is still too young to deal with the whole affair himself.
Now for the weak points.  Real action fans know that there are three types of heroines in an action movie.  Firstly there's the type we all love, the useful ones who who don't speak that much and don't get in the way.  Secondly, there are the ones who are hardly heard and don't get in the way - still quite bearable.  Then you have the ones that just talk way too much, get in the way and generally are the ones you want to smack or die.  They also generally tend to be played by the weakest actresses.  Karen falls into the latter category.  I cannot even describe how annoying this character is.  So I'll just ignore her and end on a positive note.
Watch the movie if you love an action packed thrill ride!  And avert your eyes if you just so happen to be in love with Jason Isaacs!

The Other Guys (2010) ***

After an insane and completely stupid chase scene (yet quite hilarious) by uber “cool” police detectives Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne (real name The Rock) Johnson, followed by the action cliché turned into reality in which they jump off a 20-storey building only to turn into pavement blotches, we realise that it is actually the Other Guys who happen to be the so-called heroes.

The Other Guys just happen to be “paper bitch,” Gamble (Will Ferrell) and the ludicrously angry, self-confessed “peacock” Hoitz (Mark Wahlberg).  For obvious reasons, Prius driving Gamble is desk bound.  Hoitz just happened to shoot Derek Jeter.

After arresting Steve Coogan’s,  David Ershon for “scaffolding violations,” then losing him to Ershon’s own shady security team, the Other Guys decide to investigate this kidnapping, with Hoitz convinced it is related to drugs trafficking.  

Along the way, they get to know each other.  Hoitz realises Gamble just happens to be a babe magnet and a former pimp.  And we discover Hoitz can dance (in the style of ballet).

Any way, back to the action.  It seems that Ershon has not been kidnapped, or has he?  Unfortunately, Ershon’s team keeps getting in their way, consistently taking our heroes shoes and guns.  And on top of all this humiliation, their TLC song loving Captain (Michael Keaton) refuses to believe them.

After pregnancies, Prius orgies and insane drunken binges, our dejected heroes decide to investigate off the grid and find out what’s really going on.  Turns out, Ershon is targeting the Police Pensions Fund to pay-off a host of baddies who just happen to be after him.  Unfortunately for everyone concerned, he’s no longer in control.

To conclude, this is a great buddy cop movie with a great supporting cast.  I particularly liked it, because the jokes are not unbearably crude. 

Crazy, Stupid, Love.(2011) ****

I really liked this movie.  I'm not going to say I loved it, because part of the plot left me confused in terms of what is right and what is wrong.  Is it ok to cheat on your husband, ask him for a divorce, treat him lack crap, then act like a victim when he goes out with other women whilst separated?  Someone said Steve Carrell's character was treated like a doormat by wife Emily (Julianne Moore) and I agree.  I felt quite sorry for him.  Then again, not many people would be bothered as much as I was by this particular part of the plot... and you don't feel quite so sorry for him after he meets Marisa Tomei (definitely one not to miss!)  So lets ignore that bit.  

The only other thing that bothered me a little was the length of some scenes.  That's not such a big deal either, so we'll ignore that too.

There's nothing else for me to criticise, so lets move on to the fun part.  And this movie was quite funny.  You're probably thinking that it's all down to Steve Carrell and, why on Earth would they cast someone like Ryan Gosling in this type of movie?  I'll tell you why.  It's because there's a secret comedian hiding underneath that serious exterior.  Ryan Gosling's Jacob stole the show!  He was hysterical, as a smooth operating lothario, taking Cal the doormat under his playboy wing.  What I liked about Ryan Gosling, is that his character never went over the top.  He and Emma Stone were quite adorable.  She, whose character rebuffs his playboy courtship (if you can call it that) and how she somehow gets "under his skin."  All very funny to watch, especially the re-enactment of a certain scene from Dirty Dancing.

And let's not forget the children.  Cal's son, Ronnie, who just happens to be in love with his babysitter (Jessica), who just happens to be in love with Cal.  All quite fun to watch, especially Ronnie's incessant public declarations of love for Jessica.

The best part of the movie though has to be a particular fight scene involving Cal, Jacob, Cal's nemesis - David Lindhagen (whose name Cal will more than familiarise you with) and the babysitter's Dad (John Carroll Lynch).   A hysterical scene, that you'll not want to miss.

So, in conclusion, go watch this movie!  A fun night out with friends, or someone you'd like to snuggle up to, this movie is definitely one to watch!

Jurassic Park (1993) *****

This film needs no introduction.  And it's one that made up a big part of my childhood.  I was very lucky to have seen it again recently, though this time on the big screen.  Dinosaurs, gallant yet gruff heroes, cute kids... what else could you possibly need?  Did I mention the Dinosaurs?  What I loved about this movie was that the dinosaurs looked real.  It didn't have any of the silly overdone CGI rubbish that they overuse these days.  There were no good-looking people and it was all about the acting...  and the dinosaurs.  One particular scene had a young Arianna Richards conveying her character's (Lexi) speechlessness at a level that most grown-ups cannot even achieve.  Yes she can be a little annoying, but then how many girls her age can you say aren't annoying?
Jurassic Park, if you haven't already heard of or seen it, is about an amusement Park... filled with dinosaurs.  Got your attention?  It had mine throughout.  So what happens if greedy villains, hankering over the technology to make their own dinobabies, get in the way?  You get some very hungry dinosaurs loose from their cages.  And the clever T-Rex does not like being treated like a pet as you can imagine!
Jurassic Park is one of those adventurous movies you long to be a part of.  And Speilberg is an authority of this genre.  How many of you wouldn't want to be stuck up that tree, petting a brachiosaurus?
The characters were all marvellous, each with a purpose.  From the villainous Dennis, to the cigarette munching Ray (Samuel L. Jackson), to the gallant and gruff hero - Dr Grant.  Let's not forget Richard Attenborough's John Hammond, who's enthusiasm you first get lost in, then whose stubbornness you want to shake out of him.
And who can forget the dinosaurs... the real stars of the show!  From their munching to their pooping, they'll have you in awe and jumping out of your seats!  They'll also have you laughing as you get to know their personalities.  Yes! Dinosaurs have personalities too!
I almost forgot the score, a score to define a generation!  Every time I hear that score, it takes me right back to my youth and my love for big lizards...
In conclusion, there's something for everyone.  This is an example of great family movie, something every generation will enjoy!
There's something for everyone.

Jane Eyre (2011) **

As soon as Jane Eyre had begun, I knew that this movie would be a different format from the previous Jane Eyre movies and Mini-series.  However, I decided to remain unbiased until the very end.  I did not get very far.  Different format, it maybe, but lack of chemistry is no excuse.  

Mia Wasikowska seemed extremely dull throughout the movie.  Sad does not equate to showing no emotion.  Michael Fassbender was less than mesmerising, which I found particularly perplexing as I know he is capable of delivering a flawless performance as a darkly tortured yet vulnerable soul.  (Azazeal in Hex).  Had he starred along side his Hex co-star Christina Cole (Blanche Ingram in Jane Eyre – 2006) whom he had an explosive amount of chemistry with, I’m sure the movie would have been a little more watchable. 

In fact, Mia Wasikowska’s Jane seemed to have been more enthralled by the man she is supposedly not in love with (Jamie Bell’s St John Rivers.)

I also found the script a little rambling at times, and the direction not as clear as it could have been.  Eager, I suppose to be differentiated from the previous Jane Eyre productions.  Which would be its ultimate undoing.  One does not mess with a tried and successful formula. 

Jane Eyre (2011) was not all bad though.  Dame Judi Dench was at her usual best as Mrs. Fairfax, and I have never seen a better Adele (played by Romy Settbon Moore). 

In hindsight, it is quite possible Holliday Grainger (Jane’s cousin, Diana Rivers) would have made for a better Jane.

In conclusion, it appears that it would have been best not to have made this version of Jane Eyre and left it at the 2006 production, which in my opinion is the best in terms of acting, chemistry, script and direction of all the Jane Eyre productions.